Why is it that men are so good at making sure they do what ever it is that is important to them. Why is it that it seems that every spare minute they get they feel entitled to a golf day or a massage or just a beer with mates. They have this inner voice saying ‘mate, you have worked so hard, you have a spare few hours why don’t you do what you deserve to do’.
Why is that us women throw our lives into our children and work and I know in my house there is a constant complaint (generally from myself) that I never have any ME time. That when ever I get time away from the kids it is filled with errands and chores that we feel absolutely MUST be done before we get back to the hourly rituals that is our life. We as women get a few hours off and our inner voice says ‘hurry, you have to do the Christmas shopping before you need to be home to put the roast on at 5 and feed the kids by 5.30 so that they are in bed by 7’.
Really ladies, are we putting ourselves first? Why do we find it so hard to full fill what ever it is that we ‘deserve’. I will definitely put my hand up and say that I have been known (only from time to time, ha) to have words with my husband and let him know that I don’t get to play golf or have a facials, I don’t get time to scratch myself!! It’s not fair!!!
Ladies, let me put this to you. You are going to hate me for saying this but I think it is time and I think it is necessary. We have a lot to learn from our husbands. If they think something is important they will move heaven and earth to complete that task. It is that personal sense of ‘I know what I have to do to stay happy’ that I admire so much. Obviously in any situation there must be compromises but why do we look at our husbands ability to know what is important to them as a lack of awareness as to their knowledge of what is important to us. If we don’t really know what we need then how can we expect our husbands to.
So let me ask this of you. Find out what is important to you for your own spiritual health and wellbeing (outside of the family of course). Sit down and with your partner and notify him of this. Get a shared diary and pencil your activity in there!!!!
Then forgive yourself for needing some YOU time. I will say that you looking after yourself, knowing what is important to you and not waiting for your husband to notice that you are working so hard will keep a family a lot healthier, happier and together than constantly reminding him that you don’t have time look after yourself.
Ladies, if we don’t put ourselves as number 1, if we can’t identify what is really important to us then how can we expect anyone else too.